Mice and Men
by Cullenocd
Summary: Alice cut me off. "Rosalie hates mice. Emmett thinks that Rosalie will think that the hamster is a mouse, which would give Rosalie a good excuse to jump into his arms. Then Emmett can stand there like a hero with a damsel in distress. And, based on what I


_**A/N: Just some fun I had. **_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own, or will ever own, anything pertaining to Stephenie Meyer and her characters, books, etc.**_

Emmett flicked a rubber band in my direction. It hit my leg with a hard snap, and I yelped. "Ow," I whined. Emmett just shrugged.

"I'm so bored," he complained. Only Emmett and I were home in the Cullen house. Carlisle was at work, Edward, Alice, and Jasper were hunting. Esme was running errands, and Rosalie was just avoiding my presence.

"I'm sorry," I said sarcastically. We had been sitting in various positions in the living room for almost an hour. On the floor, the couch, Emmett managed to get comfortable with his back on the floor, legs on the wall. He had done over a hundred sit-ups in that position in less then a minute. I had just stared at him, awed and slightly envious.

"What do you do for fun?" Emmett was sitting down next to the TV, leaning against the wall with his back and head. He stared at the ceiling blankly, waiting for my answer.

"What activities do I do that are fun?"

"Sure."

"Usually Edward's around..." I trailed off, trying to think of other activities.

Emmett raised his head, and his expression turned naughty. "What do you do?"

I ignored his leading question. "I dont know."

He scowled, "Then how do you know it's fun?"

I didnt know how to explain it to him. When Edward was around, we could be doing the same thing Emmett and I were doing, and I would've been content and happy, leaning into the stone of Edward's chest. He would've been stroking my hair, pressing his icy lips against the top of my hair. We could sit there for hours without complaining or getting bored. Neither of us would've suggested doing some other activity untill my stomach inevitably made it's hunger verbally known, or my eyes drifted closed and Edward would tell me that I needed to rest. And then we would lie together, in a similar position, untill I finally found sleep to the tune of my lullaby. There was no way to explain it to Emmett. But I decided to see if Emmett could be more mature then he was, so I said, "Are you ever bored with Rosalie?"

Emmett grinned. "Is that what you're getting at?"

"Not on that high of a level."

Emmett looked momentarily dissapointed. But then he brightened again. "What do you do when Edward's not around?"

"Work. Chores. Other basic human neccesities," my voice sounded extremely nonchalant. Emmett banged his head back into the wall and groaned. I wondered if it would leave a dent.

We sat there for a few more minutes, and I fell sideways onto the couch. I had been sititng upright, but it had gotten boring.

"I know!" Emmett jumped up with sudden enthusiasm. "Let's go to the pet store!"

"What are we going to do at a pet store?" My voice was apathetic.

"What are we not going to do at a pet store?" He countered. He jerked his thumb in the general direction of the garage. "C'mon, we'll take my Jeep."

I got up unwillingly and followed him as he strode off into the cavernous garage. Emmett's monster Jeep sat there, intimidating me. I thought back to the last time I was in it...and shuddered, clearing my head before the memory could haunt me. I couldnt help but glance down at the silvery crescent on my palm.

Emmett boosted me up into the passenger seat, and he was in his seat before I had even sat down to glare at the many seatbelts. 

Emmett rolled his eyes. "You wont need the off roading harness, we're going to the store, not the mountains." I timidly buckled up the regular seatbelt.

I hadnt known that Forks had a pet shop, but Emmett seemed to know where to go. He pulled into a small parking lot in front of a dark green building labeled "Pets n things"

I eyed the sign carefully. "Pets n' _things_?" 

"Mhm."

I was too scared to ask what the things were, but I trailed behind Emmett as he strode through the automatic glass doors.

"Hello, Gladys," Emmett waved to the startled looking check-out woman. He continued on without waiting for a reply, and he went straight to the parrots.

"Do you know her?" I whispered to Emmett once we were out of her hearing range. 

I knew the answer before Emmett had even told me, because I heard a faint, "It's Nancy," from behind me.

Emmett ignored my question and looked at the brightly colored macaw in front of him. It was a brilliant red, and it's wings were tipped with dark blue, green, and yellow. The parrot stared at Emmett curiously, and clucked it's tongue.

I observed the parrot closely, reveling in it's beauty. I watched it gracefully slide down the wire bars and land neatly on the bottom of the cage. Despite the bird's size, it had no difficulty staying balanced on a thin perch that ran from one end of the cage to the other. I was about to ask Emmett a question, but he was gone. I scanned the aisles for him, and spotted him poking at the cats. 

"I got bored," He told me when I walked up, keeping his eyes on the cat he was disturbing.

"This whole place is boring. Can we go home?"

"Not yet. I want to get something," and a devilish grin appeared on Emmett's face. I leaned away.

"What 'something'?" I asked nervously,

"Dont worry about it. Go wait in the Jeep."

"Go wait? Why cant I--"

"Go wait in the Jeep. I will be out in a few minutes."

I stalked away, confused and annoyed. I scrambled into the Jeep, not even bothering to pull my hood up on my raincoat to avoid the rain that was starting to fall again. I leaned back against my seat, frowning into the downpour. I couldnt see into the store through the fog, so I had no idea what Emmett was doing.

Within ten minutes, Emmett exited the store with a small box in his hands and a plastic shopping bag. He opened the driver's side door and slid the box across the seat, tossing the bag in the back seat. 

"What's that?" I asked cautiously as Emmett pulled out of the parking lot.

"Nothing." I didnt believe him in the slightest, since right after he spoke, I heard the scratching of nails against the cardboard interior of the box.

"What's in the box?" 

"You'll see," Emmett said patiently.

When we finally made it back to the safety of the Cullens garage -after Emmett had adjusted the position of the "empty" box- Emmett swore under his breath, glaring at the canary yellow Porsche that radiated a yellow glow in the room.

"I should have known..." He muttered, carefully handling the box on the seat as he climbed out of the vehicle. I followed him into the house, him mumbling phrases such as, "Takes all the fun out of it" and "Stupid physic".

Sitting in the Cullen living room now was Alice, Jasper, and Edward. Edward smiled up at me from the couch, patting the empty spot next to him. I walked quickly to the inviting area, and he wrapped his arms around me, pulling me closer. 

Emmett was standing in the doorway, holding the box against his side with one hand. Alice glared at him.

"What's in the box, Emmett?" Edward raised his eyebrows.

Emmett made a face. Within a second, he appeared in front of Edward, shoving the box in Edwards face. Edward leaned away, wrinkling his nose.

"That smells awful," Edward said disgustedly.

Emmett took the box away, and peered inside. He then proceeded to wrinkle his won nose. "Yeah, I'll have to fix that."

"What is it?" I asked, annoyed. Alice scowled.

"A hamster," Edward answered, staring at the box.

"A hamster?" Why would Emmett want a hamster?

"For Rosalie," Emmett explained.

"Rosalie wanted a hamster?" I said skeptically.

"No."

"Then why--"

Alice cut me off. "Rosalie hates mice. Emmett thinks that Rosalie will think that the hamster is a mouse, which would give Rosalie a good excuse to jump into his arms. Then Emmett can stand there like a hero with a damsel in distress. And, based on what I saw, it will work."

"That takes all the fun out of it if you tell me what will happen," Emmett complained.

_**Let me know if you want me to continue.**_


End file.
